Oddly enough, one of the biggest constants in life is that change is inevitable. Many times we are not the creators of that change so we have to adapt. For some this is harder to do than for others, but why is this? Join us this week in Deeper Thoughts to discuss why many of us have issues adapting to change.
Things don’t always go according to plan. You can resist these obstacles and cause yourself more pain, or you can be like a river in flow and move around them to still get to the destination. The water doesn’t control the obstacle. It lets it be and moves around it in the easiest way possible. It doesn’t push the boulders around, forcing them to go along with it. The river flows around or over them.
The river flow doesn’t resist the obstacle. It simply accepts it and goes around it. When we’re in flow we can do this too. But why is it so easy for water to do this, but not us?
The thing that makes this difficult for us is our ego and the attachments we had to the intended outcomes. Our ego causes us to wear filtered glasses and when something comes along that doesn’t mesh with that filter it causes us to be defensive. Both are part of what the ego is designed to do. These are some of the ways it tries to keep us safe.
Change can be seen as dangerous because of the unknown that comes along with it. But ultimately, it’s not the unknown that gets our ego riled up, but the lack of control we have to the situation is the danger we sense. Our ego likes to know what to expect. That knowledge gives us safety because we know how to respond.
We get defensive. We get angry. We even overthink, causing us to fret and worry. We react in whatever way we can think of on the spot to do what we can to try to feel safe. Being in these reactionary states either cause us to make situations worse. And if we’re in that frozen state of fear and worry, we’re too focused on those feelings to calmly look at the situation and see the bigger picture, even if we are standing still.
But when we can let go of our egotistical need to always be in control and take off the filtered glasses so see the picture clearly, we can see ways we can adapt to the situation and even make it work for us in our favor, possibly better than the original plan. This is being in flow with the situation.
Let’s look at a simple analogy. If you’re dangling on the edge of a cliff and hanging onto a rock, but that rock is breaking away, what should you do? Should you desperately cling to that rock, or should you let go to grab ahold to a place that isn’t breaking away? Sometimes you have to let go to take a hold of something better.
Look at companies that have been around for decades. When their customer’s needs change or market trends change, the ones who survive adapt to the new trends to stay at the top. Look at Netflix. Originally you ordered movies from them that were mailed to you and you returned them. But as online streaming took over they switched their format to this to keep customers coming back. Disney and other movies did this to stay in business, especially during the Covid lockdowns. They went in flow with the changes, adapted, and stayed relevant.
When we surrender the control we used to have over the situation that is no longer there, we’ve freed up space. The universe doesn’t like a vacuum and thus it will fill this new empty space with new opportunities. When you’re not reactionary and are seeing things more clearly, you can take this newly filled space and adapt your actions to flow with the change easier. This allows the possibility of either gaining new control or recognizing if it’s time to leave the situation.
Go inward and examine your past. How do you react to sudden change? Do you respond or react to it? Do you freak out or go in flow to adapt? Is it like this anytime change comes up or does it vary depending on the situation?
Take time to understand what causes you to be so resistant to the hiccups in life that require adaptation. Learn what you can do to put an end to that resistance so in the future you can be in flow, adapt, and overcome whatever obstacles are thrown your way.
As humans we are an adaptive species. We’ve had to adapt and overcome many obstacles over the eons to reach where we are now. We didn’t do this by being ridgid. We came across massive changes time and time again and went in flow to adapt and overcome these changes. Sometimes it was moving to new areas, other times it was going from being peaceful to fighting back against tyranny. Many times these situations were forced upon us and it was literally adapt or die.
Hopefully this article will help some of you take a look into how you handle change when it comes up. If you’re resistant instead of going in flow with it to adapt, look into ways you can ease yourself into better adapting. Are there times when you need to resist and fight against change? Absolutely, but many times it’s less painful to go along with changes and find ways to use it to your advantage and come out on top.
“Be like water, my friend.”- Bruce Lee, and like always, have an enlightening day.
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