You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t force it to drink. You can’t save anyone who doesn’t want to save themselves. We’ve all heard these clichés countless times, but clichés are quoted as much as they are for a reason. We often pay these clichés no mind until it involves someone close to us.
This week’s Deeper Thoughts post is one that’s close to home for me. It’s more akin to a journal entry than my usual weekly posts. It’s a lesson the Universe wants me to learn and thus keeps repeating itself in a recurring cycle.
During our growth there are times when our dear friends and family are stuck in their own cycles. We want to pull them out and help them, but people stuck in lower vibrations are not always keen on advice. It doesn’t mean they’re bad people. They’re simply not on the same wavelength as you anymore.
Many times the best thing we can do is to take a step back and remove ourselves from the situation. We want to step in and help, but by doing so we’re only creating friction. We want to help those we care about and try to guide them down a better path, but the people we’re trying to help aren’t ready. They can still be stuck in the programming and traps of their own minds and perceive you as “other” and think you're against them. They may think you’re trying to bully them, acting “Holier Than Thou,” or trying to boss them around. They don’t see things from your perspective and don’t see that you’re wanting to do what’s in their best interest. But by stepping in to help all the time, are you acting in their best interest?
For many of us it’s counter intuitive. This is especially true when we’ve had parental wounding where one or both parents always came to you to vent their frustrations and problems. We subconsciously label ourselves with the role of the “fixer” when issues arise.
Sometimes we have to learn to step back and let things run its course. The best thing you can do is to continue to work on yourself and raise your own frequency. Sometimes they may rise up to match your energy. Sometimes they don’t. We all have our own journey we must walk. Not everyone walks at the same pace. They’ll get to their destinations in their own time just as you will yours.
There’s another angle we have to look at with these circumstances. By learning when to step back and let events unfold we stop interfering with the lessons others must learn. Our interference (even when it comes from a place of love) can hinder their growth. Stepping back and letting the course of events take place allows others to face their karma. They can’t ever learn to be accountable if we keep trying to swoop in to save the day. They can’t learn to be aware of the consequences of their own actions if we’re trying to be Superman for them.
Taking a step back is a hard lesson for many of us to learn. It often goes against a lot of programming and conditioning we received in our childhood. As I stated earlier, I’m being faced with this lesson once again. It’s frustrating because we care about our loved ones and want to see them grow and expand, but many times the best way they can do that is us to step aside and them expand on their own. Work on taking time to focus on your own healing journey and hopefully by taking a step back you will help those loved ones you're worried about spread their wings and grow. Sometimes the worst way to help someone is to try and help them.
I hope this article is helpful to any and all of those who are experiencing this. Thank you for reading, and have an enlightening day!
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